Category Archives: point of view

I Tried and I Failed (Participation Trophy)

“I’ll fantasize of being manic and leaving us behind. In your eyes, you were the one that tried. Acceptance is what holds us here. Then you my dear are the one I fear tonight.  We’ll try this one more time.” ~Underoath

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He asks questions he thinks deserves to be answered.
Integrating compassion into entropy.
Taking shots at people who would be better off longing for more.
And lacking the maturity to ask questions that may make a semblance of sense.

She walks through life with a splint in her personality.
Happy and sad inhabit the same space.
Depression is a welcoming change of pace.
And lacking the steam to press on when she has a minuscule amount of joy.

Together they form the modern entitlement.
Equal parts apathy and laziness.
Hoping to be discovered from a singular occurrence.
Stepping to the left because it is easier than stepping to the right.

Or maybe the right seems like an easier choice.
I don’t think it matters to the modern consumer.
Where taking it easy looks like the way I am supposed to be.
Instead of failing and learning and not getting that participation trophy.

Not to diminish hard times and face to face lies.
Not to say we are not all a bit lowly.
But today it is easier to wait than try.
When they tell you that it is okay to be not okay.

When hope is diminished to a flame hidden.
And the lights from peoples eyes die so quickly.
The hopeless have better questions than the believer.
When we fight and die in the name of being tolerant to my fellow man.

Just go out and work hard.
Go out and love your fellow man.
Find out who your are and die fighting for it.
Instead of sitting down waiting to be discovered by lying over indulgent agencies..

I don’t want your participation trophy.
I want to earn my rewards, my accomplishments, my chance to have hope and be free.
I don’t care what you think of me.
I choose to carry on and I strive to love despite all the times I wanted to flee.

At least I tried.
Not for a trophy, or for an award.
But to be a better version of who I once was.
To do better and to do good.
To be someone that I always knew I could.

A Teenage Vantage

“The speaker in this door is blown out, so nothing sounds right. Taking my time, taking this drive, waving this town goodbye.”
                                 ~Dashboard Confessional


~A Teenage Vantage~

A teenage vantage on a Midwest night.
Being older than those times, yet feeling obliged.
When your years have passed, and a crush has entered your mind.
Maturity can be gained, but crushes stay the same.

I wake up and realize I had a dream that is lingering.
It is a dream where I thought of her name.
I breathe in to start my day
And reflect on what will happen if I stay.

Hoping and praying for a chance meeting.
The dream infecting every thought I am thinking.
As I drive and sing songs that remind me of our first introduction.
And I smile at the thought of this memory past.

The only problem I have come to find,
Is a problem that is not life or death.
A problem that goes back to teenage angst.
A problem brought on by taste.

Why do I fall for country music girls?

A teenage vantage downtown in winter months.
Being older than those times, yet wanting more.
When years have gone by and the day stands still.
Hoping and praying for a chance meeting.

When the heart sings to close.
The mind wondering, what if?
Building the friend and wishing to keep it.
Even if a relationship fails to fit.

The only problem I have come to find,
Is a problem that is petty and serious.
A problem that goes beyond old teenage angst.
A problem that presses forward to my particular tastes.

Why do I always fall for country music girls?
Why is it the twang that catches their ears?
Why do I fall for girls that sing the songs that I loathe?
Why do I fall for country music girls?

A teenage vantage,
And a teenage point of view.
Narrow and closed in.
Yet, I still wonder why…

Why I fall for country music girls.
Why do I fall at the most inopportune times?