Category Archives: man

But Here We Are

“This business is small victories. In a sea, in a sea of misery, well I’ll take a small victory.”      ~American Opera

You said that it was okay to let down your guard down.
When you came into my life and broke me to the ground.
You told me that this train would take me home.
You said let’s just get on and go.

But time has shown that what you said is not what you meant.
What you said is the traffic light turning red whenever we approach.
Every time the train is about to go straight you hit the switch to change the path.
Going to the left instead of heading right.

It’s not okay to come in and say that everything will be okay.
If it means that every time you look into each others eyes it is a lie.
A time waiting to end it.
With feelings and logic being tossed to the side.

But here we are.
Distant and filled with snark.
And not the kind that equals a laugh.
But here we are.

Of course it is a two way street.
It is both a push and pull.
But at this point I think it is better to just go.
Go and head down different one ways.

You said that it was okay to let down your guard down.
When you came into my life and broke me to the ground.
You told me that this train would take me home.
You said let’s just get on and go…

Ring in a New Tune (Part 2 of 3)

 

Please Lord, give me at least one more song to sing.
One more voice to get me through the day.
A melody that I can follow.
Or maybe even one that is chaotic but beautiful.

Take a chord and let it ring true.
A single sound that lights this day through and through.
Follow it up with the beat of a drum,
So I may have a reason to walk and know where I am from.

Please Lord, give me one more song.
Let it stretch high and take shape before you and me.
A melody that I can follow.
Or maybe even one that is chaotic but true.

My expectations of myself cloud my expectations of others.
A shroud that muffles the sound of an otherwise beautiful tone.
I look and see, but do I really?
Do I see what really needs to be seen.

You look at my brokenness,
With my broken strings and busted tom.
You look at me in my depression,
And somehow you pull out a truth that I never saw before.

Please Lord, give me one more song to sing.
Fix my broken instruments, while I try and play before you.
Help me make a melody that I can follow.
Or maybe one that is chaotic but doesn’t mislead.

Please Lord, I am only a man.
One that is made from flesh and blood.
Maker, I need a song to sing.
A song to show the world that the soul is what needs to be cleaned.

Easy Listening Meet Metal

“This is for the kids with the beaten in lips, whose parents try to shut them up using their fists. Keep living loud and proud. They never can hold you down. This is for the kids with a soul like mine. When people tell you living is a waste of your time. Keep living loud and proud. They can never hold you down.” ~Beartooth

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What is going on inside of the exits?
Inside of the blacks and the whites?
I am going to sit and here and listen to a few songs.
Ones that enter into my head and don’t ever let go.

Detailing the lies being told and figuring out what is in the fold.
Heading towards an entrance or an exit.
It doesn’t really matter which, because they are one and the same.
Listening to a song that I decided will bless your name.

A thunderous drive into the double bass.
Answering the calls of the screamer to the singer.
A metal drive that couples punk into the machine.
Mixing clean singing with chaos, that brings out the beauty of  everything around me.

A melody contradicting dichotomy.
Empathy surging through my entropy.
Organized chaos diving in and out of my song.
I wouldn’t have it any other way.

I weep and then I yell.
I call out and fall.
I decided to come down on my own.
I didn’t need your sympathy, but I needed your eyes.

This song is one that has highs and lows.
Singing about the kids that decided their lives don’t deserve a song.
What Hell are we living in when music can’t bless your soul?
A complete set of lies that answer only to the name of the enemy.

Light the fire and drive into the melody.
Set fire to the city and couple it with life.
For it is better to burn it to the ground… 
Than living a life of mediocrity.

I will sit here for a while and listen to my song.
I love seeing how it has developed.
A driving force of the double bass and the screams that ignite my soul.
Then to mellow out and sing out a praise.

Cheers to you…the empty and the lost.
Cheers to the easy listening and to the metal.
Cheers to the kids that decided to come to the show.
Cheers to you and your life that is more beautiful than you know.

“We’re nothing but hollow vessels in search of what makes us alive. I never said this was my revolution when you looked me in the eye.” ~Underoath

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Looking Towards Being a Man

“Wake up in the middle of the night. Just don’t believe everything’s all right when thoughts are running around your head.” ~Emery

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He stands at the end of his rope, hoping for a tug to get him back on the edge.
Answering a call and checking the voice twice.
Is it true the person on the other line is me?
Or is he deciding to treat it as a way to escape being free?

Extinguishing the hope that shrouds his soul.
Taking the next best thing that never was an answer.
Accepting the end as his own personal heaven.
Instead of reflecting and taking it a bit slower.

Screwing what he knows to be the truth.
Twisting my every word into  the next big controversy.
Enlightening his target audience to the staleness of his life.
He is the one that hates the way things turned out.

But they would not have been that way if he just paid attention.
He was stuck in his own bubble.
Waiting for someone to come and pop it.
When he should have escaped by himself.

A man not squander his potential in pursuit of another.
A man should not let himself implode and create a barrier pushing others away.
A prayer that enters in and changes the way you perceive the worlds color.
Become the man that you were meant to be.
And do not let the past decide who you are today.

 

AwKwArD GlaNcEs

“So this is strange, our sidestepping has come to be a brilliant dance where nobody leads at all.”  ~Dashboard Confessional

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He revels in AwKwArD GlaNcEs, sidestep conversations, and dances where there are only left feet.
He answers uncomfortable situations, when they call him on the phone.
AwKwArD GlaNcEs equal the possibility of escaping the city.
To find a way to let friendship spark anew.

Not wanting to be with her.
Not needing to try and understand his feelings.
For he knows that even if he misses you
He could do something about it.

He revels in AwKwArD GlaNcEs, and sidestep passes, and dances that has no pilot.

So he asks, “What would you like to talk about? Maybe about how the possibility is spilling over into everyday life?”
He‘ll wait for an answer as long as it takes.
For the length of time is removed by you and him when the city is crumbling.
When you miss someone it creates a wall that hopefully falls down.

He guesses he revels in those AwKwArD GlaNcEs, and dances that have no leads.

Look he doesn’t want you to think he has an answer.
He doesn’t, he just knows that friendship means more to him than nothing.
Knowing friendship is a determining factor, and means more to him than these AwKwArD GlaNcEs.
Filled with sidesteps and eye contact that never seems to jive right.

He doesn’t find himself to be brave.
He doesn’t think that he is determined enough to be.
At least not in this situation.
Because missing you is easier than feeling the heat of the sun in summer.

He revels in AwKwArD GlaNcEs, sidestep conversations, and dances where there are only left feet.
He answers to uncomfortable situations, when they call him on the phone.
AwKwArD GlaNcEs equal the possibility of escaping the city.
To find a way to let friendship spark anew.

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“And I move to slow and think too fast, and the first rainbow I see will be the last.” ~Say Anything

 

Always Growing

Count your blessings that you’ve never seen the things the simple things were ours to take. But the questions danced around our innocence and now the innocence is nothing more than faith.                 ~Emery

~Always Growing~

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Articulating a response is harder than you think.
A simple hello turns into a head shake while walking away.
When words jumble in your mouth,
And the lack of coherence starts to fly south.

Growing up can be hard.
Whether you are 16 or 73.
Everyday can be new.
And everyday can teach you how to be you.

A practice known by many.
The lack of anything interesting to say.
When word vomit becomes the norm.
How embarrassing.

A boy walks into the room.
A boy sees.
A boy leaves.
No, man was ever seen.

Growing up can be hard.
Whether you are 16 or 73.
Everyday can be new.
And everyday can teach you how to be you.

Age is now older and things seem to have fallen into place.
A family a wife, and safe grace.
But even in this life a tragedy can strike fast.
And you may fall apart or remember you have won in the past.

Articulating a response can be hard.
Whether it is a crush in front of you or a child asking questions.
The rules of life can be simple.
It is what you do with them that can make a boy into man.

Growing up can be hard.
Whether you are 16 or 73.
Everyday can be new.
And everyday can teach you how to be you.