Category Archives: faith

Slow Down and Take a Deep Breath

“Future gardens from all this rain
Future flowers from present pain
We’re bound together and our lives are bound to change
You don’t know how beautiful you are. ”     ~Jon Foreman

Slow Down!

Activating prior knowledge to understand the things running in your head.
Damaging the psyche of your soul,
By displaying negative thoughts throughout your heart.
And despising what is underneath because you feel it is not good enough.

It’s interesting to point out that you make a mistake and then fix it,
But for some reason it just takes you back to a mistake further in your past.
I wish that you can overcome the mistakes that plague you,
To move forward and realize you are worth more than you know.

Take it into account that we are all human and are far from perfect.
We make mistakes and we pass it onto ourselves.
Time and time again we learn to answer questions we already know the answers, too.
But lessons that good, deserve to be learned time and time again.

Slow down and take a breath.
Put into perspective what is happening and what you are worth.
Don’t let your failures persuade you from who you really are.
Slow down and take a breath.
And remember that you have so many around you who care more than you know.

Morning Sickness

“Every lament is a love song.” ~Switchfoot

He stands on the edge of his mind and his heart.
Largely distracted by what is going on around him, and what is going on inside. 
Which one will win?
He knows, but he doesn't feel like telling and one. 

A morning sickness that has nothing to do with pregnancy.
A sickness developed from opening his eyes and realizing he is alive.
Stricken to his sheets, the ones that feel like home.
For the floor is lava and o scary to venture into alone.

Ducking and diving in and out.
Avoiding the fire that's coming from all around him.
The gun sight is set to his heart and others to his head.
One good shot and everything goes away, from them or even from the one he is carrying.

But the truth is he doesn't want this to be the case.
I don't think any of us really do.
But sometimes this world seems to be too much, and all he wants is to be somewhere else.
With someone who will never forsake him.

He sits alone on the porch that looks out into the yard.
A storm is brewing and the lightening is coming at regular intervals.
The wind picks up and the trees start to sway to the beat.
Clap clap, bang bang, flash flash...boom. 

His funeral is tomorrow and not an eye is dry.
Closed casket in the morning and sandwiches with aunts in the afternoon.
"We should get together more often." They will say.
"What an awful way to get the family together."

Leaving behind the mother and the father.
A part of the world ripped away by one single act.
Friends that loved  him, now on the floor wondering what they could have done better.
Wondering what they could have done to help him fly...

Looking Towards Being a Man

“Wake up in the middle of the night. Just don’t believe everything’s all right when thoughts are running around your head.” ~Emery

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He stands at the end of his rope, hoping for a tug to get him back on the edge.
Answering a call and checking the voice twice.
Is it true the person on the other line is me?
Or is he deciding to treat it as a way to escape being free?

Extinguishing the hope that shrouds his soul.
Taking the next best thing that never was an answer.
Accepting the end as his own personal heaven.
Instead of reflecting and taking it a bit slower.

Screwing what he knows to be the truth.
Twisting my every word into  the next big controversy.
Enlightening his target audience to the staleness of his life.
He is the one that hates the way things turned out.

But they would not have been that way if he just paid attention.
He was stuck in his own bubble.
Waiting for someone to come and pop it.
When he should have escaped by himself.

A man not squander his potential in pursuit of another.
A man should not let himself implode and create a barrier pushing others away.
A prayer that enters in and changes the way you perceive the worlds color.
Become the man that you were meant to be.
And do not let the past decide who you are today.

 

My Personal Perception Personified By Convictions

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“I was a pharisee. I never saw the need for grace. Then your love came to me, stood next to mine and I saw that I was poor. Show me I was poor, show us we are…glorious. We are glorious not from what good we have done, but from being the least.”  ~As Cities Burn

 

Sunlight hits your cheek, and the glimmer awakens something deep inside of me.
A longing that I never knew existed before.
Well, that is not entirely true.
I have known, and I have seen but I have never believed.

Sunlight graces the edge of a cliff.
The shadow it creates is more beautiful than the light…to me.
It is signifies the stretch of time between then and now.
Before your glimmer equaled more than an anxious feeling.

Take a chance on me and one day God I will fully be more.
Take a chance on me Lord and I will fail you.
Take a chance on me King and I will disappoint.
But if you take a chance on me, I swear I will believe.

Sunlight hits another.
That ends before it even began.
Not a chance to truly develop because I effed that up.
I let the pain of the past come in and take what may.

Sunlight decides to shine on me, and I hate the way it looks me in the eye.
I prefer to be held in a lie.
To take it and nurture it so I can hide from the truth.
The truth that I am worth it, that grace has set me free.

Take a chance on me friend and I will fail you.
Take a chance on me girl and maybe we can help one another.
Take a chance on me good sir and our friendship might blossom into perfect chaos.
But if you take a chance on me know I am all in, and every chance I get I wish to do something for you…not for me.

I sing for my sins.
I sing for my false religion.
I tantalize my being with a song that is not from the One who gave it all.
I am an idolater when I need a bit of a pick me up.

But Jesus I beg of thee…take a chance on me.
Let me be an offering when I run away.
Let my knees buckle when the sunlight reveals the flaws.
Have me weep in an apartment on a Sunday afternoon when it is just you and me.

Sunlight is my enemy, it is my best friend, it is my lover, and my guide.
I run from the sunlight just as much as I run to it.
Comfort from my own understanding, depression caused from my way of thinking.
Sinning and believing, doubting and worshiping.

Baptizing the inter sanctum of my mind’s eye.
A world view taking root before the very nature of life even starts.
I take the wine and the bread to partake in my belief.
And then I look to the ground and try to do it my own way.

Will I ever get a chance to pick a side.
Will the struggle be made plain, so I can actually reach up to Heaven and be wiped clean?
This world is a mine filled travesty, made into a sin woven tapestry.
I do not belong in this place and my body fights that fact every day.

Do you know who I am?!
Do you think I am this mess of a man?
Do you think I have zero intelligence on the subject of my Savior?
Do you know who I am?!

Do I know who I am?!
Do I think I am worth the very air I breathe?
Do I think that there is something better after death?
Do I know who I am?!

I am a man…and this is my personal perception personified by my convictions.
A sin filled life from the start, and a longing to keep on doing it.
When I know that my vices will never let me win.
Yet, I struggle and I call out day after day.
For I am a man, that does not like to go outside when the sun is shining and hoping to play.

I am a man… broken, bitter, loved, saved.
I am just a man…one that has no control, ever since I went down on my knees.
I am not a savior…but I do look to one.
I am a man…flawed, hurt, depressed, anxious.
Yet hope is still there…

The sunlight hits a cheek far away from where I am today.
One day I think I will see.
If I want to be a better me…
I need to answer prayer with prayer and know there is hope that never goes away.

“Burning out my sins until there’s nothing but dust. Holding me with care into your cigarette. Cause the God I believe in never worked on a campaign trail.”    ~Brand New519048855_1280x720

The Fight Continues (I Fought the Devil Part 2)

“I wrestled the angel, for more than a name. But I want to be one today, centred and true. I’m singing spirit take me up in arms with you.”    ~Switchfoot

The Fight Continues (I Fought the Devil Part 2)

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We fight for purpose and an understanding of what is to come.
We fight for meaning, hoping that what we say won’t come undone.
We fight because we are not meant to be in this world.
We fight because it is better than standing still.

Last week I fought the devil and I won.
His time in the sun is done.

Today is a day where I realise it is not my job to change anybody.
I am not a person who can save.
That job is for my God.
My job is to show love just as my Maker loves me.

Last week I fought God, and of course He won.
I fought to understand what it means to be His son.

It is in these moments of depression and strife,
Where I realise that I am allowed to be alive.
I shout and I pump up my fist.
I yell and cry, because I know that one day I will die.

But before that day comes I hope to have my time in the sun.
Seeking and reporting on all that God has done.
Being more than a lackey for the world and its ways.
But I wish to bask in the heat of the suns rays.

Everyday I fight myself.
I don’t mean to put my life on a shelf.
I want to use what I have learned.
To be last and to become first and see what I have discerned.

I Fought the Devil

Do I divide and fall apart, ‘cuz my bright is too sly to hold back all my dark. And the ship went down in sight of land, and at the gates does Thomas ask to see my hands?

~Brand New

I Fought the Devil

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My world stretches to the end and then it springs back again.
I feel the gambit of pain and joy as I cross paths with the devil and with God.
A battle between what is real and what is fake.
A battle that is fought with the heart, body, and mind.

Today I fought the devil and he won.
I let him have his time in the sun.

Desiring to be better than what I want to be.
Searching for radiance that can light a path with a single look.
Infiltrating the stronghold held by the devil himself.
Seeing the city on a hill because it is the day.

Today I fought the devil and he won.
I let him have his time in the sun.

Interesting to think that there is so much He let’s us do.
Instead of forcing us to worship all the way through.
But here we are defying His name.
When we are down and showing so much shame.

Today I fought an angel and he won.
I fought him for a name and to learn how o be closer to the Son.

It takes more than a desire for it to come to fruition.
Convictions that are held on to.
Lessons that are learned and practised upon.
Lessons that are remembered because of belief and not knowledge.

Today I fought the devil and kicked him in the face.
I laid my head down and stared God in the face.
I was told to pray not just before my day,
But during the storm and when the sun puts its head away.

You Have Legs…Use Them

“I Will Not Pretend That We Are All Friends, When All Of Us Know That We’Re Not. And I Am Afraid Of Pulling My Name, Away From The Places I Know I’Ve Been On This Slow Down Descent.”                                                                                                                                      ~ Deas Vail

~ Have Legs … Use Them ~     


In moments like these I hope too much.

I dream up responses that let go of, instead of holding on.
The hope does not seem to be as real as it once was.
This is where my faith needs to take over and show me how to believe.
Targeting the balance of the left and the right.
Taking up arms against the heart.
And taking shots at the mind.
Duck and cover for this world is gonna blow.
It will rise up in flame.
It will enter into the line that was never supposed to be crossed.
A little further down the road.
A little to close to Hell.
In moments like these, I wish to much.
I see the stars and remember not all of them are real.
I hope, hope decides that it will manifest out of me.
Even when I need to reach deep down inside while I flee.
The shot is lined up after I moved from the right to the left.
Finger on the trigger.
The pulse is the beat.
Duck and cover for this world is gonna blow.
Enter in and enter out.
Move your butt to a better place.
Enter in enter out.
Regret does nothing but get in the way.
String along brilliant acts.
Get together and breathe in more than contrition.
Break down the fence that is holding you back.
Take the shot and bring yourself to a place of happiness.
In moments like these I am a kid that knows his place.
In moments like these this Hell transforms into something worthwhile.
While the hope secures faith.
And the faith depends on how much I wish to represent my belief.
Doubt equals a soul who chose it over believing.
Two sides of the same coin. 
Both used for target practice.
Duck and cover for this world is going to blow.
Erase it and move on.
Learn and travel further.
Hope for the faith that is inside all. 
For it is better to live than to stand still.
You have legs … Use them.